....your daily life can be found on Texts from Last Night
....people don't ask whether or not you are home - just what party you are at tonight
....Ke$ha is concerned about your partying habits
....Neil Patrick Harris stole your car
....the local police know you by your first name
........but won't tell anyone that they party with you too
....you are not the least bit concerned about the fact that you just woke up next to a hooker from Vegas
........even though you're in Wisconsin
....your toilet left your house with a note saying, "After that last bender, I had to resign."
....you have become a legend on Facebook
....your license has been suspended before you even got it
....Tucker Max ain't got ish on you
....fraternities around the world have a shrine to your drinking habits
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